Thursday, January 27, 2005

Eat Your Heart Out... Really...

A Nairobi man will be sentenced to death soon for he literally took the term 'eat your wife's heart out'. The police arrested him in his house as he began to devour the heart. Blood running down from his mouth. Kenyan authorities said that "If only Bessie Head was here, she'll write more on Botswana..."

Also, I would like to commomerate the death of the late Johnny Carson. He was once a host of the Tonight Show. He moved the show from NY to Burbank. He would later take the show for two decades and in 1992, his last guest were Robin Williams and some other guy. The last show had no audience and that some other guy sang him out.

So, 23 January 2005... Johnny Carson Died.

If A Genie Could Grant Me 5 Wishes, I Would Wish... Oil Prices Went Up and So Do Wish Allowance

a) Eternal happiness for mankind
b) Make a real Willy Wonka and make the world's hunger go away with chocolate
c) cure for AIDS and cancer
d) a girlfriend (description shalt not b given)
e) not to be anti-semitic... the Jews in the media to get the fudge out.

Sunday, January 16, 2005

Nothing Much But To Give A Line

"Seems there's a big debate going on about whether a new TV commercial for Minute Maid orange juice portrays Popeye and Bluto as gay lovers or just good friends. The commercial shows Popeye and Bluto at the beach and riding a bicycle for two. I don't think that makes them gay. I think the fact they both find Olive Oyl attractive, that makes them gay." (From "The Tonight Show," June 4, 2001)

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

Rush Biology and Rush Psychics

Today, in school, we rushed for everything. In English, teacher explained blantly about the homework. In the Malay class, the teacher explained shortly of what to do in our summary. Add Maths and History was quite calm until Biology and Physics. The teacher rushed us until we were a fighting terms at each other. Well, today, I conducted a poem about crossing the Rio Grande.

Border Unbound
by Impulse

In the land of the free,
Vast empty spaces as far as the eye can see,
Democracy in action just beyond the river,
The river call the Rio Grande.

Crossing the land will be hard,
U.S. guards patrol the area,
We plan to leave at midnight,
To get across the Rio Grande.

I will be free in America,
No oppression and no problems,
Climb over the fence,
Into the river called the Rio Grande.

Crossing the river is not difficult,
Wading through the river was easy,
Avoiding detection was speechlessly hard,
Sirens went off when we crossed the Rio Grande.

Shouts and shrieks were heard,
We ran towards the land of the free,
The helicopter gun down two of my people,
On the waters of the Rio Grande.

I ran quickly above to the bank,
Looking for a bush to hide,
Panting and cries heard,
Massacre created at the Rio Grande.

I walked for 4 hours along the road,
Hitchhiking to a city of dreams,
Dehydrated and saddened,
I am the only one who crossed the Rio Grande.

A kind stranger picked me up,
Put me up for work in the land of the free,
I am lucky to survive,
For I have gave a declamation about,
My crossing over the dangerous Rio Grande.

Have a nice day!

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

New Day Of School and Really Long Update

New school year and I must say, it is a real b*tch. I was first put in 4P then moved to 4C because of lesson collisions (Islamic Studies). 4P was very quiet and nice but then, I have to move to the class of deliquents. The class I have been in and stuck with it for three years. Three absolute years of terror and this year, terror has died down.

I pledged at least RM 100 to the Tsunami victims which I would now say getting really old. Umm, my trip to Shanghai (China) sucked and this year, I joined the new Forumites Forum. It is so cool that now, I become really helpful and I gained more friends there.

In school this year, I made some new friends. Justin, Pershanth, Kuo Jian and Adam are new students. They are quite bright and we are all in the same league. Maybe my immatureness may still stick but I am always mature when it comes to helping people.

Umm... I made friends with Toboe (De Marcus), Kae (yup, real name), FR (Belgian), moojuice (some US chick) and a whole lotta people. I have also made some enemies but they will not be mentioned cause later, unhired guns will come and ask me for any job that I can offer. :D

Anyway, that's it for now. Until a bigger thing happen, I will post more.

In the great words of Cris Fromage: KIFFLOM, BROTHER-UNCLE!