Friday, February 23, 2007

The List of People Who Went Bat Shit Insane: #1

I have a number of people who are now considered bat shit insane. Their delusions have let the media (mainly tabloids) to attack them furiously with rumors and 100% bat shit insane stunts that have put them on a pedestal of 'FUCKING idiocy'.

#1: Britney Spears

This girl has gone nuts. I have never seen a woman so much in denial. I didn't give a rat's ass if she was not a virgin, had breast implants or sang a song about being a sexual slave but what she has done this year, in the year of the PIG mind you, has topped the idiot-o-meter.

What this stupid bitch has done was that she went to a hairdressers. In a public place. Alright, seems alright. Maybe, she's gonna perm her hair or shit, right? FUCK NO! She grabbed the shaver from a hairdresser and shaved off HER HEAD!!! I don't know whether this is a fashion statement or she is trying to send a message to the aliens at Nebulon 8 but after that, she goes to a tattoo parlor and gets a tattoo on her wrists. Then, she goes partying with her friends and then, checks in for rehab.

Now, she said she wanted the press to leave her alone. I want to spell out this word to you.


And I am not a qualified doctor or a therapist.... but what she has done is normally affiliated with mental patients with some sort schizophrenic manic depressive disorder. She leaves the place within the 24 hour period after CHECKING IN! After hearing that, my head started the screaming in my BRAIN because there is no other asshole like her that pisses me off this much in the span of one week. ONE WEEK! It normally takes me 2 years to hate a person so much but after this, FUCK IT! I am changing my perception towards her.

The worst part is that she has CUSTODY..... BUTT FUCKING CUSTODY!!!! OF HER CHILDREN!!! 7 months and 18 months!!!!! I really pity the Mexican maid who had to take care of them and actually had to say to the children that their mother was too shit faced to even hug 'em. Too bad she came recently from Mexico and she no habla Ingles. I mean, K Fed was estranged like David Gest to Liza Minelli but this.... ho ho ho.... this is on a new LEVEL!!! I thought my favorite artist, Michael Jackson, was fucked up in the head but he must be like, "I allegedly slept with kids but she shaved her head.... partied.... check into rehab..... HEEEEE HEEEEEEEE...... and shamomnah..... left after 24 hours? OWWWWWWW! NUTS!"

Jesus Tap Dancing On A Stick Christ, this woman must be stopped before she takes a cat and feeds them to a bunch of fish by shaving it and giving it manic depressive pills to slowly drown it in the water. BRITNEY SPEARS! I have to complete what that Devil from YAAFM says, "YOU ARE A FUCKING BAT SHIT INSANE, MOTHERFUCKING BITCHETY ASS MORON!!!!"

Britney Spears, have a good day and FUCK YOU!!

Friday, February 02, 2007

And now, for something completely different

Well, I have been writing parodies nonstop since the holidays and I have come up with only 13. 13? Why 13? Well, let's see. I have been World of Warcrafting (no TBC though). Let's say that now, I am just dedicated to make people laugh. From now on, I am going to make people laugh. If there are any rantings you see here today, they will be in a stand up comedy routine I will be doing.

Here are my parodies. HERE. And here.

As the famous Borat Sagdivey always says, Dzienkuje!


Nothing to post. Just writing some crap. Yup, really nothing.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

I Hate Chinese People From China

"If there is no country, there is no you." - my mother and some friggin' philosopher.

Well, let me tell you that is a whole load of dookie and I do mean dookie. I hate Chinese people from China. They are rude and abrasive, all up-on-your-face kind of attitude. I mean, I am fine with them being smelly but Jesus tap dancing Christ, there are just some that border on complete and utter idiocy.

First, they spit on my shoe. On a trip to the Forbidden City, some asshole Chinese motherfucker spit on my shoe and stepped on it. If Beijing 2008 is going to happen, this must not happen. How many athletes must face this dilemma? That began my hatred on China and its people (not the race but the citizens).

Then, the numerous incidents in Hong Kong Disneyland. I read this on Wikipedia. On the opening day, 16,000 people visited HKDisney, one third of the visitors come from mainland China.

Here is the rest of the problems:
Although they did bring good business to the park, they also caused some problems. Sources such as the Apple Daily and Ming Pao showed pictures of visitors from mainland China smoking in restaurants in non-smoking areas and a woman helping a young child loosen his trousers to urinate beside a flower bed. Also included were reports of mainlanders defecating in washroom sinks; going barefoot and laying their feet on chairs; cutting through queue lines; as well as spitting in public, a habit regarded as unsanitary and poor etiquette in Hong Kong, especially since the SARS and avian flu outbreaks. Many Hongkongers were upset that Disney allowed such behaviour in the park.
Soon , we expect them to actually take a dump on Mickey Mouse when the parade is going on, in the middle of December 2007. Hopefully, that WILL cancel off plans for Beijing 2008.

The worse part about that was them defecating in the sink. It's not funny but it IS. Where did these people come from? I understand there are holes in China where you do your business but the sink. The urinal is bad but a sink. I don't want people going to the toilet and after take a piss in the urinal, they go up to the sink to wash their hands. And when they stare down to find the knob to turn on the water, they see this huge dookie. this doo doo protruding out in the open, in front of his face. A compound of phosphorus, carbon, hydrogen and several types of other elements to form shit molecules that travel through the air and into the person's nose. And the reaction will be devastating. I just do not want that. This is unacceptable.

China, buck up fuckers. Time to change. You heard the Bob Dylan song before? Come on, the wall fell down a decade ago so Dylan would have or might have been there. The song called "Times That Are A Changing" - FOLLOW THAT!

So, that's that.

Monday, January 08, 2007

Back for a New Agenda

I am back here for a new agenda. I will still post once in a while if I am not caught up by:

a) World of Warcraft
b) Writing Fragrant Romance
c) Writing some articles for the Kazakh Times

Well, back to the news.